Bryce Versus the Squirrel

My life with Squirrels has not always been so harmonious. As I was returning home one day many years ago I saw a squirrel that has gotten itself trapped in our garage.

To the squirrel, the garage was pay dirt. My parents (I was still living with my parents at the time) had just bought a ton of birdseed and they kept it in a cardboard box on the floor of the garage. To a young squirrel, this was dinner served on a silver platter. Ten seconds of chewing was all it took to get through the box into the yummy birdseed.

When I got home and saw the squirrel, I didn't think much. I had spent the last four years of my life at Whitworth amongst the small gray vermin and knew they were scared of people. To get rid of this infestation was going to be simple. I charged at it.

At their quarterly meetings, squirrels get together and decide what they will be collectively afraid of. Humans charging at them is something they agreed would scare the piss out of them which can only be followed by running up the nearest tree as fast as possible.

This squirrel missed that meeting. Rather than run away, which you recall they are supposed to do, this one charged back. I didn't know what to do. All of a sudden, I had a squirrel running up my leg in an obvious attempt to protect the enormous box of birdseed. This was not going well. I did the only thing a grown man could which was to scream like a little girl, prance around trying to shake it off, and jump in the back of my truck once it fell off my leg.

What an experience.

Ruby, our new puppy, love her new chew toy my sister got her: a squirrel.